Hey guys... people love whores!! Who knew, right?
Remember my post from last week where I called NY a dirty vagina? Well I was wrong. NY... I'm really sorry about that. Hey, hey. Come here. Don't walk away. I really mean that. You're... well, you're great.
Last night I had yet another show at the same theatre from last week. Not only did we sell that bitch out but it was a DAMN FINE SHOW.
I mean, we sold out the theatre at 11pm on a Friday. YES! So awesome.
We made a sweet $30 each. Which we promptly spent on vodka. YOU'RE WELCOME, LIVER!
Carrie did an AWESOME job presenting her "whoring it up" story to the audience. She was nervous as hell but really pulled it together and kicked some ass. Eliza read a story written by Liz and kicked ass. It was harder for her, it not being her story, but honestly I've heard Liz tell the story and Eliza did it perfectly. Brandy Barber's story (about her being a horny, horny child/teen/adult) might be in playgirl! Shhh... I SAID MIGHT. And Carolyn Castiglia... I mean THE LADY CAN TELL A DAMN STORY.
I think the audience appreciated us throwing condoms to them as we entered as a "basketball team" of whores. I have to thank Carrie again for getting us a great deal on some condoms. We ran across the street to the bodega when I realized I had forgotten to get some. We asked the guy behind the counter for 4 packs (relax! there were only 3 in each pack) and told him we were "going to have a lot of sex tonight" to which he replied, "can I come?" to which I said, "I DON'T KNOW... CAN YOU!" (I am 12). So Carrie, she says to the guy she says, "Hey... since we're buying 4 packs how about you give us one free?" and the guy, the thinks and he says, "mmm... how about I give you the 4th 1/2 off?" I, of course, say YEAH! OK! but Carrie, she haggles her way to getting us that 4th box FREE. Good goin!
Oh and then the guy says if he can come with us for our night of sex he'll bring TEN boxes of condoms AND BEER! And Carrie and I think about it... and we almost ask, "What KIND of beer?" but I mean come on. We're not THAT whorey.
Seriously, the show was awesome. The audience was SO appreciative and again, thanks to Carrie for bringing about 70% of them.
If we do it again you must come.
(That's what she said.)