Tuesday, July 31, 2007

YONF!!

YONF!

Year!
Of!
No!
Fear!

YEAR OF! NO FEAR!!

YEAROFNOOOO….FEAR!!

I decided that because Jen Mac and Eliza's "Year of" things are so inspiring that I shall now commence on my "Year of" thing… my Year of No Fear!

I think "YONF" has a nice little ring to it don't you?

That's it. Starting August 1st there is no more fear in my life. YOU DIG?

I guess I technically started a little while ago. I had a crush on a boy for a long time. I stepped up and told him… (ok… his friend…which is fine because this was BEFORE YONF. B.F. So that doesn't count…) that I liked him and now I'm dating my crush and insanely happy!

GO YONF!!

The next step is putting together an SNL audition tape! It's a wild and crazy dream (heyo) but come on! What's the worst that could happen!? I don't get the job? I don't have the job now! So who the frig cares!

GO YONF!!

This is going to be a good year, sans the fear.

Oh and my roommate is doing it to. Fuckin love her.

WHY DON'T YOU JUST BEAT IT, FEAR.

Love,

Glennis

Thursday, July 26, 2007

Talkin Pennies

I posted this commercial on YouTube a long time ago and it keeps getting comments. (I'm almost embarassed at how I recorded it... I held my camera phone up to the tv. I think you can even hear me laugh at one point. I'm gonna start selling copies of this on dvd in the subway.) Anyway, the comments are all pretty much the same sentiment as me save for the most recent one. It cracked me up even more than the commercial!

Here's the commercial:


Here's my favorite comment:
"Even though this commercial is funny, that Brazilian guy is legit. People tend to have accents like that when English isn't their first language. How do I know? That guy is one of my good friends. He is a funny guy., but I think what you all are saying is just mean. So whoever said "worst accents EVER" was wrong. Except for the English chick, she isn't English, she's from Arkansas."

Hahahahaaaaaaa. Omg stop it. "Except for that English chick..." I am DYING. And I'm sorry but even if his accent is real it's still hilarious. Wait... am I coming off as racist? Oh lord, I hope not.

Oh and on a personal note, I am back at work and feeling much better. I'm fixed! Yay! And yes, I learned my lesson mommy, I promise I'm gonna get more sleep now.

Love,

Glennis "Shingles" McMurray

Sunday, July 22, 2007

A Sick, Sick Sign

Guys! I have mother effing SHINGLES! Man, when I get sick I really get sick! (Although there was no crapping in the bed this time, thank you very much...)

About 2 weeks ago I got a really stiff neck and it just kept getting more and more painful. I thought it was a chiropractor thing so I went to a lovely woman who cracked, rubbed and ice-packed me and the next day it was 10x worse. I wasn't too concerned until my roommate looked at these weird swollen lymph nodes and said, "Glennis! It looks like you have an alien under your skin!" I looked in the mirror and she was right, right behind my ear there was a cluster of about 4 peanut-sized lumps that were very visible from under the skin. But still I just assumed they were knots from... a neck injury and even though I was in TERRIBLE pain (I literally woke up crying it hurt that bad) I decided it would just go away on its own. But when I woke up with freakin blisters on my neck I knew I needed to go see someone. So on Saturday I hobbled over to St. Vincent's on 12th and went to the emergency room. It was actually really fast and really great service. I thought I'd sit there forever but it was fairly quick. The doctor took a look at my swollen lymph nodes and thought it might be mono so she took some blood and then she saw the blisters and said, "oh! you have shingles!"

Shingles is the adult version of chicken pox. It's a virus that, once you get chicken pox as a kid, lays dormant in your nervous system your entire life. If your immune system gets really depleted due to stress, no sleep or something more severe like HIV or chemotherapy, it can attack! And give you blisters on your neck! And jesus h. CHRIST is it painful. They gave me vicadin for the pain and VALTREX for the virus. Because yes, it's a herpes. Not like vagina herpes you creeps. I just wish I could explain this pain to you guys. Mother of god I love me some vicadin.

So that's that and I think this is a sign that I need to slow down. If that means quitting some stuff I love, then so be it. I just need a damn vacation, y'all.

Hope you are doing well!!

xoxo

Love,

Glennis

Tuesday, July 17, 2007

New Panda-site!

I'm almost 100% done with the new I Eat Pandas website. There are a few changes I need to make but for the most part you can now gaze upon it and obsess over us. That's what you do anyway, right? This just makes it that much easier!

www.ieatpandas.com

Love,

Glennis

Monday, July 16, 2007

Fear

From this moment on NO MORE FEAR! Fear has jumped out my window! Fear has flung itself from my balcony onto the pillowy tree that stands below it... but oh no! Fear did not land softly in the tree! Fear is splattered all over the sidewalk! Fear! IS! NO! MORE!!

Now if you'll excuse me I have a lot of shit to do!

Love,

Glennis "Balls" McMurray

(Also...CONGRATULATIONS, MATT!!!)

Wednesday, July 04, 2007

The Dolce Vid-ea

Holy shit. Thank you, Chad.

http://www.dolcevillari.com/suite2-vid.htm

Amazing. I was sitting here thinking, "I should create a video like that for my own room" and then stopped myself right off. There's no way it'd be this great.

Enjoy.

Love,

Glennis

Tuesday, July 03, 2007

Providance '07 Recap

This past weekend marked I Eat Pandas' 3rd trip to the Providence Improv Festival and I have to say, this was the best trip yet!

First of all that video that I posted last night (of the talking cats) had Eliza and I in stitches all weekend. All she'd have to do is say, "Oh Don Piaaano" and I would have to cross my legs to keep pee from coming out. And still, a little bit did. Yes. We find that video THAT HILARIOUS. The first time I showed it to her she was literally on the floor holding her sides. How often does that happen!? Oh god I love that video.

Oh and you guys you should have seen our hotel room. It was like a psych-ward room! It was COMPLETELY white from top to bottom. White tile floors, white walls, white couch, white bed and the only art on the walls was some brushed metal shit that looked like it had been there since the 80s. Ridiculously white. I was saying to Eliza on our way up that I loved the Carmela Soprano look for houses even though it's totally ugly and cookie cutter. So when we walked into the room I think she expected me to go "ooooh yay!" when instead I went "WHAT THE FRIG!?" Oh wait! You can totally see the pictures on the website: http://www.dolcevillari.com/dolce.htm. Hilarious. Someone said "this room looks like they just hose it down after people leave" and I immediately wanted to cut someones throat and splatter blood everywhere. What else is a white room good for?!

We used the shit out of that hotel room, too. We had parties in it both nights, inviting all our new improv buddies (and some old ones as well) to share in the whiteness. The first night (Friday) we smoked and played music and basically "Aerosmith'd" the place until the night manager came banging on the door to remind us that it was 4am. We pussied out and made everyone leave. What kind of rock stars are we anyway!? Real rock stars would have told him to go eff his mother after blowing cigarette smoke in his face and then would have taken a dump on the comforter. (I did take a dump on the comforter but for other reasons. Why don't I have a boyfriend again?)

The 2nd night we partied until 4am and when I got tired I yelled "everyone get the fuck out! Glennis go bed!" and then sprawled out on the couch like a true lady. Seriously…why don't dudes want to get with this?

We had two shows while up there (no, we didn't travel to just trash hotel rooms and laugh at talking cats) and the show on Saturday night was with the AMAZING TJ & Dave! We got to open for them! It was seriously such an honor for us. We watched their show after ours and I just can't tell you how amazing those guys are. Their object work alone made me want to cut off my hands and give them to them. And switching characters with such ease and taking over the other's character and…jesus just everything about it. It's such a treat to watch. TJ is also a great guy. I had met him a while ago when my ex and I traveled up to Maine (he was up there working and living for the winter) and when I walked over to him to re-introduce myself he was like "yes! Glennis! You sang 'Magic Man' when we all went out karaokeing!" And not ONCE did he introduce me as "_____'s ex girlfriend." That's the sign of a true gentleman :)

And of course you know we didn't go all the way to Providence without hitting up the Providence Place Mall. Word! We hit the usual stores (Delia*s, Hot Topic, Forevsies Twenty-Onesies) and a few new ones; they now have an H&M which isn't picked over and disgusting like the ones in NY. We saw two movies (Ratatouille and 1408) neither of which left me that impressed. I love Pixar but that shit's not as magical now that Disney took it over. Boo, I hate you so much Disney. And honestly, 1408 just made us laugh.

We traded in the bus back for the cushier, beerier train and did indeed have a congratulatory beer on the way home. We arrived back in NY safe and sound and with one more successful trip under our belts.

All in all it was a really successful trip and a great time. Thanks to Mauro and everyone who worked so hard to put it together!

And when I look back on this trip I'll always remember one thing the most:

That fucking cat video.

Have a great day!

Love,

Glennis

Monday, July 02, 2007

Ooohhh Don Piano

There are a few things that make me laugh no matter how many times I watch/hear them. One of the more recent ones was Paul Reubens on 30 Rock (...FOR COMING TO MY BIRTHDAY!). I watched that clip maybe...oh...I don't know...30 TIMES. It rocked. Heyoooo.

This weekend Eliza and I were in Providence (holy shit so much fun for reals...that's the next post...my sleeping pill is kicking in) and I remembered that I had never shown her this video. Kate showed me the video a while ago while we were sitting in a coffee shop and we almost got kicked out. I won't say anything else cuz I don't want to ruin it for you or build it up to much but it left Eliza on the floor, crying. CRYING.

So now, I present to you:

Cat's Talking (the best part starts at :50 in)


And it gets even better if you watch it with your eyes closed.

Ok I'm about to fall over. Mommy took her medicine. Mewwwwmewwwmew.

Have a good night!

xoxo

Glennis
(Why I eyes ya)