Tuesday, May 02, 2006

Glennis' Anatomy, Episode #2

Episode Two
Not a day over 50

Exterior Shot: Glennis' Apartment Building (poppy piano music and mouth-harp, theme music)



Interior: Glennis looks at herself in the mirror checking for fine lines, wrinkles, sun spots, age bumps, creases, dents, pimples (...which she hopes to find. A sign of youth!) and all around old-age.

Glennis
Lookin good, killer. Rrrreow. 30, my ass. I look Ga-hoooood!


Glennis stops mushing her face and looks at two plane tickets on her dresser.

Glennis
Chicago Improv Fest, here I come!



Exterior shot of airplane in flight.



Glennis (Off-camera)
(sung) I'm like a bird, I'll only fly awa-ay. I don't know where my home is, I don't know where my home is. I'm like a bird...

Stewardess (Off-camera)
(Sweet, professional tone)
Miss, please take your seat and refrain from singing for the remainder of the flight.

Glennis (Off-camera)
(humming quietly) Hmmm hmm hmm hmm... hmmm hmm hm hmmmmm hmm hmmmmmm

Stewardess (Off-camera)
(Sassy black woman tone)
Ooooh, gurl. I will CUT YOU!

Exterior shot: Chicago Theatre, Chicago, IL



Interior shot: Theatre



Glennis sits in a box seat awaiting the start of the show. Two (2) Male Festival Interns also sit up in the box. Glennis DOES NOT KNOW THESE PEOPLE.

Glennis
Weee! I love fun! I am having such a great time! Yay! Fun! Yay!


Intern 1
Duuuuurrrr. Hey I've never sat in the Queen's box seat in this theatre before. That's what they call this. Did you know that? Hey are you the queen? Dur Dur Doi.


Glennis
Hahahaa (laughing) Yes, yes... that's me! I am Queen! Yay!


Intern 1
Funny, I thought the Queen would be MUCH YOUNGER.


(beat)

Intern 1
a-DURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR.


Glennis
WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU SAY!?


Glennis slowly stands up. Cut to: shot of her hands as they clench into tiny little punching machines. She takes two steps backward, closes her eyes and then unleashes a beating the likes of which have NEVER BEEN SEEN BEFORE!!!

PUNCH!


SHOVE!


BALL!


KICK!


PULL


CAT!


Glennis picks up the stupid intern and fires him over the edge of the balcony!

Glennis' daydream ends.

She looks off in the distance.

Glennis
Old. Soooo old.


The End

2 comments:

Carrie said...

That was amazing. I have no words...

Snow White said...

Not only am I giving Glennis' Anatomy a full season order, but I'm picking you up for next season as well. In the meantime, I would like to have you over for a Restalyne party.