Tuesday, February 13, 2007

Confession Time

Guys, I have a confession. I'm Anna Nicole's baby-daddy.


Shut up you stupid Parenthases, jerk! Why are you always putting me down?? I can't say anything without you inserting your snarky little comments set on delivering a low blow (that's what she said). STOP IT! That's doesn't even work! (That's what she said.)

Ok seriously, you wanna play this game? I'm gonna take you down, beyotch. Meet my new friend Box Brackets. ['ello.] Box Brackets is from ENGLAND, BITCH.


You can act like you don't care but watch this:

[Parentheses (the singular is parenthesis, with an i) – sometimes called round brackets, curved brackets, oval brackets, or just brackets; or, colloquially, parens, or fingernails – are used to contain parenthetical (or optional, additional) material in a sentence that could be removed without destroying the meaning of the main text. You see? You ah expendable. Nuffing is lost wifout you. Good day. I SAID GOOD DAY.]

Wow. WOW. Ouch. That's gotta hurt, Paretheses. HOW YOU LIKE ME NOW!?! (On your knees.) Stop that. (That's what he said. Last night. When you were trying to get in his pa...)


There will be no more unauthorized Paretheses usage on this blog.

[What abowt me, chap?]

You can do what you want, Box Brackets. Especially if it's directed at that sour little twat, P. I know you got my back.

[Right you ah, Miss. Why, I'd rightly give moi life fo you!]

{EXCUUUUUUUSE ME!? You'd rightly give your what for her?!}

[Dahling! Oh it's... 'ello there. My love. My peach. Sparkle in my heart. I was just...]

{I know know what you were "just" doing! You were trying to hit on this little prastitoot [sic], Glennis! CUT THAT OUT! Don't you sic my words to protect her from looking like she can't spell!}

Wow, guys... calm down here. I'm seriously flattered but not at ALL interested. He's all yours, Curly Brackets. Um... Mrs. Curly Brackets. Ma'am.

{You better not be interested! Cuz he's MINE!!}

Like I said! Seriously, I'm just gonna leave you two alone to talk. Come on, Parenthases, let's give them some space. (GET IT, SPACE. LIKE A SPACE BAR. CUZ YOU'RE TYPING.) Oh my god you are obnoxious. COME ON. (My face.) STOP IT YOU ASS FACE SON OF A BITCH MOTHER OF GOD STOP IT!!


{Yeah... wow.}

[Parentheses is just a kid, Glennis. That was a litt'l uncawlled for.]

{You ought to be ashamed of yourself.}

No! But...I didn't know Parentheses was a kid! You saw how he pushed me over the edge! Come on!



(My face)

AHHH! That's it. Enough. You're all fired. Get the off my blog.

THE END (I'm retarded.)


Glennis (ree-ree tard face)

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