Glesbo: Through with You!

Thursday, November 08, 2007

Through with You!

Oh New York. I love you! I really really love you more than any other living place in the world! Well, that I've been anyway. Which is not a lot. But lately, New York. Lately! You have been wearing my little body down! Mostly it's your transportation. For instance, New York, why come no cabbies here know how to get to my house in the Willage? Is it because I say Willage? I'll stop.

Don't interrupt me, NEW YORK! Dammit. Listen, I'm not breaking up with you. I just think we need a break.

(I just realized I'm turning this post into a "NY is my boyfriend and we're taking a break" post and that's probably been done a million times but please...bear with me here. I'm tired and cranky and STILL COUGHING)

So remember the other night when I did a show at UCB and I was sick and tired and could barely talk let alone sing and all I wanted to do was go home and it was 11pm and you got me that taxi to go home? And then remember when I looked down to call someone on my phone and the taxi was passing 9th Avenue and going to the WEST SIDE HIGHWAY? Do you remember that? No!? No!? I bet you'd remember if I had my TITS HANGING OUT.

Sorry. I didn't mean to yell.

It's just...well why would he take the West Side Highway?? Like that makes no sense since you have to go back in on 14th Street and take Washingtown down and all I'm saying is there was construction and the dude should have known, once we hit construction once, not to go back IN THE SAME DIRECTION.

So yeah. I spent $11 on a cab that dropped me off 9 blocks from my house. NYC blocks.

New York!! Why would you do that to me!?

And then why would you make me stand on the platform for 20 minutes this morning waiting for a train making me late when I'd left my house with plenty of time to get to where I was goin!? Why?

Do you see what I'm getting at?

We need a break.

So listen....

I'm gonna see another state this weekend.

It won't mean anything.

I'm mean I'll probably go down on it but you don't like that anyway.

Wait, that's weird. Why don't you like that?

Most states really...

No.

No. I'm not even going to go there.

I'll talk to you when I get back.

I still love you.

Love,

Glennis

2 comments:

Dori Jennings said...: CALI?!??!?!; 2:38 PM
Glennis McMurray said...: Aw honey no :( PA! But wait for it... February might bring me back-back to Cali-Cali!

xoxo; 10:08 AM

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Glennis-isms

Clair Stare (v) - Derived from the fabulous Clair Huxtable's show-stopping stare. As powerful as any words, fist or bullets and twice as effective. "Piss slowly dripping down his leg he knew at once that his airplane hijacking attempt had, once again, been thwarted by the Clair Stare."

Out-Regis-and-Kelly (adj.) - Used to describe someone's fabulous, sparkly outrageousness. "Not sure if the girl in front of her had fallen or begun a strange, errotic dance, she chose to classify her as out-regis-and-kelly."

Out-Regis-and-Kathy-Lee (adj.) - Used to describe someone's slightly off-putting, drunken or outdated behavior. "The party took a turn for the worse when they arrived and, in truly out-regis-and-kathy-lee fashion, upper decked every bathroom in the house."

Prrrthetic (adj.) - Used to describe a pathetic action that, somehow, ends up making you look adorable. "The prrr-thetic attempt to get him back fell short when the aerial photo of his face made out of cats was overexposed."