Wednesday, November 30, 2005

Bathroom Humor

Hey guys, what's up.

I'm at work in my fancy law firm full of fancy lawyers who I really don't deal with that much, but when I do it's always a joy.

I just went to the bathroom and since it's nearing the end of the day I was lucky enough to choose the stall with no toilet paper left. Grr! Don't you hate that!!? Luckily I had gone #1 so I could have just pulled up my pants and waddled to the next stall to finish the job, but just as I was about to do so... someone walked into the bathroom. I sat there for a minute thinking I'd wait them out (and give my butt its "out of pants" time for today) and then that minute turned into 2... and I started to panic. Was this person ever going to leave?

I realize this is not the kind of situation that warrants panic mode, but again, I'm Glennis and I love to worry and/or panic about insignificant things.

So I sat there one minute more (they weren't in a stall... there was no noise coming from outside... and I could still see their feet if I bent down. What were they doing!?) and then decided to be bold and ask that person, whoever they may be: secretary or lawyer, for toilet paper.

"Excuse me? Can you hand me some toilet paper, I'm out in here."

No answer.


Hm... maybe they left and I didn't hear the door shut because I was so deep in thought?

I peaked down and their feet were still there!!!

"Excuse me??" I whined in my sweetiest sweeterstein voice.


Who the hell is refusing to answer my pleas for soft cushiony goodness to wipe my lady parts?!?

That, my friends, I will never know. I suppose I could go around the office looking for a woman with nude stockings and black pumps, but I suppose that's like looking for a needle in a needle stack isn't it?

I did finally get myself some TP. And I gave myself a big kiss in the mirror just to replenish the love.

Little did Glennis know, half-way around the world her long lost fraternal twin brother was experiencing the exact same thing.

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