Glesbo: Poor Blarg!

This poor, poor blarg has been all but abandoned! I hardly think one tiny post about how awesome Toni Collette and her awesome dress are counts as blarging. I am ashamed. Truly ashamed. I've probably lost all my readership and, well, that's what counts right? That's what mommy told me growing up... eat your beets, don't touch wieners and keep a consistent blog. Jesus! I haven't heeded any of her advice at all!! That's OK though because wieners are awesome and beets make your poop red. And blogging? What about blogging?

A few of those beets look like wieners. Killing two birds!

Well, kids, blogging was super-fun when I had an office job and I sat there in a foggy haze of sadness and desperation. I looked forward to it amidst my humdrum day full of binders and toner. But, honestly, I look back on those blog posts and they're pretty damn funny. So it was all worthwhile. I guess.

My point is I want to start blogging again and so I'm going to. Do I have better things to do with my time? Sure. I mean right now I need to write 10-minutes worth of material on "resolutions" for my show tonight (Supercream Supreme at Legion Bar) and write all our guests their own theme song.

GUESS WHICH GIRL LIKES TO PUT TOO MUCH ON HER PLATE!!? This girl! (Literally and figuratively. Pass the taters.)

And so, dear reader, if you're out there. This is a promise to you and myself that I will indeed start blogging more. And eating more beets. And touching more wieners. Why not make 2010 GREAT?

Love you. Really I do.

Glennis

Glennis-isms

Clair Stare (v) - Derived from the fabulous Clair Huxtable's show-stopping stare. As powerful as any words, fist or bullets and twice as effective. "Piss slowly dripping down his leg he knew at once that his airplane hijacking attempt had, once again, been thwarted by the Clair Stare."

Out-Regis-and-Kelly (adj.) - Used to describe someone's fabulous, sparkly outrageousness. "Not sure if the girl in front of her had fallen or begun a strange, errotic dance, she chose to classify her as out-regis-and-kelly."

Out-Regis-and-Kathy-Lee (adj.) - Used to describe someone's slightly off-putting, drunken or outdated behavior. "The party took a turn for the worse when they arrived and, in truly out-regis-and-kathy-lee fashion, upper decked every bathroom in the house."

Prrrthetic (adj.) - Used to describe a pathetic action that, somehow, ends up making you look adorable. "The prrr-thetic attempt to get him back fell short when the aerial photo of his face made out of cats was overexposed."

Glesbo

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Poor Blarg!

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